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Take the bull by the horns

Apache Warrior
Things went south from here.

I love animals, but I don’t trust them. I believe they should be observed from a safe distance which, in my experience, means about six inches between me and my dinner plate. If David Attenborough has taught me anything it’s this: you’re either reading the menu, or you’re on it. Cows mightn’t be man eaters but that doesn’t mean they’re not dangerous, especially when armed. Continue reading “Take the bull by the horns”

The one ton post.

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Further investigation was required.

What on earth, I wondered, was a one ton peg? How big was the washing line if the peg weighed a thousand kilos? Seriously, that was my first thought when farmer Joe said to me over the phone ‘Go down the Collarenebri Road and turn right at the sign for the one tone peg, I’m in that paddock.’ Continue reading “The one ton post.”

Macadamia Madness

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Look harmless enough don’t they.

Contrary to popular belief, macadamia nuts are dangerous. At least they are if you farm them on the side of a hill. Each kernel is safely contained in a perfectly spherical nut with a steel like constitution.  Scatter these naturally occurring ball bearings around the base of trees planted on a steep slope and you have an accident waiting to happen.  Continue reading “Macadamia Madness”

3rd time is a charm.

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Gretta with Belinda. Always take a local first time.

It took a hangover and three attempts but we finally got to fly in Moree. Spurred on by our weekend in the Hunter Valley and the barrage of social media posts from everyone flying in Canowindra for the last week, we were determined to start flying in our new home. Continue reading “3rd time is a charm.”

A little bit of country.

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Cathy & Chris with Tamworth’s big golden guitar.

I have it on good authority that Tamworth is nothing like Nashville Tennessee. I’m told that in Nashville there is a country and western singer on every street corner and in every bar. The place is just littered with country music hopefuls playing their hearts out, yearning to be discovered. While Tamworth is far removed from Nashville, it does promote itself as the capital of country music in Australia. So, I was hopeful that a weekend catch up with our American friends Cathy and Chris –who are big music fans—might provide an opportunity to broaden my horizons. Continue reading “A little bit of country.”

Get yourself an iron

ironing
And so it begins…

I’ve spent a bit of time in the last two weeks staying in motel rooms. Not to be confused with fancy city hotels used by the likes of airline cabin crews, I was accommodated in the type of country motels that haven’t been renovated since the 80’s. I don’t mind the retro bathroom with the brown tiles and chunky plastic tap ware, it reminds me of the places my parents managed when we were kids. At the end of the day the rooms are always clean and anything is better that sharing a tent in a base camp. Continue reading “Get yourself an iron”

Office envy

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I’m confident my office will end up looking like this.

I’ve got office envy. After a week at our Narrabri branch I’ve realized just how shabby our little office at Moree is compared to the glamourous conditions my colleagues work in every day. Not for them the daily task of vacuuming up a thousand dead crickets. Continue reading “Office envy”

An Australia Day weekend.

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Another tough morning

You learn something new every day. I didn’t know for example that you could open a bottle of champagne with a glass. I’ve seen it done with a sword and even a butter knife but never with the base of a champagne flute. All it requires is someone with the know-how and a quality bottle of wine. Luckily, we had both. Continue reading “An Australia Day weekend.”

Got legs, can’t use ’em.

 

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Sennybridge Wales 1997. Warm, dry and injury free.

Sat with the top half of my body in the car with my legs yet to follow I contemplated the fact that the activities of the previous day might not have been so bright. My brain was sending the necessary signals to my legs but they were refusing to respond, at least not without serious protest. I grasped each leg behind the knee and manhandled each in turn into the foot well. It dawned on me then that if I couldn’t even get behind the wheel of a car, how was I going to drive it? Continue reading “Got legs, can’t use ’em.”

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