Out and about

Home invasion.

Edgarbug[1]Can you believe we’ve been here 12 months already? I had planned to write an insightful piece for the anniversary but was overtaken by a terrifying home invasion which only serves to highlight the pitfalls of living in the country. It was night and still 30˚C outside so I felt the chill on entering the air conditioned living room dressed only in a pair of shorts. Before long I was sitting on the couch wrapped up to my chin in a bunny rug when I suddenly felt a crawling sensation on the back of my neck. Continue reading “Home invasion.”


Behind enemy lines.

Someone has been playing in canola.

‘Leave no man behind.’ This simple statement conjures up images of US warriors giving their all to retrieve fallen comrades Black Hawk Down style. At a recent ballooning weekend in Canowindra one retrieve crew went to similar heroic lengths when a balloon landed deep behind locked gates and nothing was spared to recover it. The balloon that it is. Pilots are a dime a dozen but the kit is well worth the effort of getting back. Continue reading “Behind enemy lines.”

Dissapointment in Armidale

Port and a fire, how civilised.

I feel for the employees of the Australian Pesticides and Veterinary Medicines Authority (APVMA) who are facing the prospect of relocating to Armidale.  After a year of living on the edge of nowhere I thought it would be hard not to be impressed by any town that boasts half a dozen shops and a café. Instead it speaks volumes for Moree that there’s more to a town than what is in its main street. Continue reading “Dissapointment in Armidale”

Taking the road less traveled.

2017-07-20 21.33.10
This was the good bit of road.

My boss likes me to be out on the road. Preferably a back road. If there’s a roundabout dirt track to get from A to B he’ll send me on it. It’s all part of my area familiarisation plan. Our ‘patch’ covers 42,000 square kilometres (roughly the size of the Netherlands) so there’s no shortage of obscure back roads for me to investigate. I also suspect he’s setting me up to get lost as a practical joke; just itching for me to call for help. Continue reading “Taking the road less traveled.”

Who’s the turkey now?

Just got bitten by this turkey!

I received a text message from Gretta today which said simply ‘Just got bitten by this turkey!’ Attached was a picture of said bush turkey. Based on this limited information I will surmise what happened. Continue reading “Who’s the turkey now?”

How cold?


Hat off to anybody working in those conditions.

If there’s one thing I don’t miss about Canberra, it’s winter. Continue reading “How cold?”

Take the bull by the horns

Apache Warrior
Things went south from here.

I love animals, but I don’t trust them. I believe they should be observed from a safe distance which, in my experience, means about six inches between me and my dinner plate. If David Attenborough has taught me anything it’s this: you’re either reading the menu, or you’re on it. Cows mightn’t be man eaters but that doesn’t mean they’re not dangerous, especially when armed. Continue reading “Take the bull by the horns”

The one ton post.

Further investigation was required.

What on earth, I wondered, was a one ton peg? How big was the washing line if the peg weighed a thousand kilos? Seriously, that was my first thought when farmer Joe said to me over the phone ‘Go down the Collarenebri Road and turn right at the sign for the one tone peg, I’m in that paddock.’ Continue reading “The one ton post.”

Macadamia Madness

Look harmless enough don’t they.

Contrary to popular belief, macadamia nuts are dangerous. At least they are if you farm them on the side of a hill. Each kernel is safely contained in a perfectly spherical nut with a steel like constitution.  Scatter these naturally occurring ball bearings around the base of trees planted on a steep slope and you have an accident waiting to happen.  Continue reading “Macadamia Madness”

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